when he tryin' to get his money for the rent.
for the cadillacs and gas money spent
cuz' a whole lot of bitches talkin' shit.
well for what it's worth, i did make rent this month, G.
but lemme tell you, it ain't easy being a Web 2.0 P-I-M-P.
Image via Wikipedia
...especially in these Good Times we got going on around here. banks going belly up, people losing their homes & jobs... damn. people so fucking scared they voted a brother into the white [sic] house. i guess that's progress, but now we got our asses in both hands worrying about credit card debt, mortgage foreclosures, and wondering whether we gonna get PAID. better go slap the shit out my startups and make sure they come up with the Cash-Money, G. damn straight.
now listen up bitches:
Most of the time, entrepreneurs think about 2 types of users:
- Visitors ("Johns")
Image via WikipediaContributors ("HOs")
Simply put, there are "HOs" who contribute content to your site (they give you their stuff, or "put out"). The rest of the people on your site are the "Johns" who visit & view the content... and might even pay you some cash money (if it's good shit).
However, typically a 3rd & very important audience is forgotten about, which is quite likely even more important than either of the two above. this is the group of people who promote & distribute existing content / refer new users, altho they might not ever contribute any original content themselves:
- Distributors ("Pimps")
Image via Wikipedia
These folks help share, digg, tweet, email, & embed your content, promote it to new audiences, and bring users back to your site. They are the "Pimps" who distribute your content. And most likely, they are WAAAAAAyyyy more important (relatively speaking) than the Johns or the Hos.
(disclaimer & note to self: i'm pretty sure at this point i have now lost most of my female audience, and/or anyone with any shred of class or civilized sensibility. for those of you still with me, i hope you find the rest of this post worth the crass language & white-trash upbringing i am helpless to remove from my discourse)
See, most folks probably design their site audiences like this:
1) first, let's get people to contribute content, so i'll emphasize THEIR needs and orient the site & features around CONTRIBUTORS (HOs).
2) next, i need to make sure people who are just average VISITORS (Johns) can view the site well, so i'll build lots of ways to use & experience that content. and hopefully they're share some of it too, and maybe we'll "go viral"!
3) lastly, some of those folks who are contributors will probably help DISTRIBUTE content too, so i'll give them a few tools to help do that, but they should already be motivated to help distribute so we don't need to worry too much. WRONG, WRONG, WRONG.
Now, there are already several errors in assumption/prioritization here:
Image by skinnie minnie via Flickr
- people who DISTRIBUTE are not necessarily the same people who CONTRIBUTE (translation: "PIMPs ain't HOs")
- even for those who do both, it's possible the higher-value action is to DISTRIBUTE, and yet most UI design emphasizes CONTRIBUTE features & actions higher. but Contributors need Distributors and/or Affiliates to help bring in Visitors. ("HOs need PIMPs to get JOHNs")
- most of your VISITORS ain't gonna do shit except check out your content for free, jerk off on something they like, then skip town before paying you one goddamn cent. ("window shopping is free & easy, except in Amsterdam... but PIMPS help make sure JOHNs pay up de HOs")
however, the order you should REALLY use is THIS:
that's right folks. The Internet works just like the Ghet-to.
Pimps go FIRST, bee-atch.
cuz I'll beat your ass with my Pimp Cane and Cup and one mouse click tied behind my back.
we now return you to your regularly schedule
Sesame Ghetto Street programming: